Just The Matter of Time

My friend is not very happy recently. It seems that his dad cannot make it. After quitting smoking for many years, he still gets lung cancer. Life doesn't seem fair. But the end happens to anyone. It's just the matter of time.

When my grandma got the liver cancer, I couldn't feel her leaving us at all. We still had a normal lives. She still travelled among families in different countries. Then she left us all in the sudden.

I still remember the last word I told her. My brother put me on speaker phone to talk to her in Philippines. She was on oxygen mask and could not reply. I feel that I was so stupid. I should have encouraged her to live on. And actually she fought until the last minute, according to my brothers. But I told her that I would keep my promise. I feel so bad. First of all, while she was fighting, I told her something as if the last words. Secondly, it's a promise I cannot really keep. When I think about it now, I still feel very bad...

~ Lindberg